When the inner child and the adult aren’t integrated, we become disconnected from ourselves. Due to traumatic experiences as a child, when our needs weren’t met emotionally, mentally or physically we can often become stuck at the age we experienced the trauma. When this occurs, we not only create belief systems about ourselves, we act on them. At our deepest core we feel that there is something wrong with us, we may have emotionally immature relationships and find ourselves in cycles of toxicity. We may rarely express ourselves emotionally for fear of rejection or judgement. We compromise ourselves for the sake of others, we struggle to say NO, unable to defend or protect ourselves and speak up verbally. Be critical of self, or have a high drive to overachieve, have trouble starting things and…finishing them.
And on the other end of the spectrum, it is also common for there to be an element of comfort found in rebellion, a feeling of aliveness when in conflict with others yet lack a strong sense of identity.
When I discovered all these traits of unresolved trauma that resonated with me, it was a revolutionary moment. I was then able to begin untangling the web that I had woven around myself, finally let go and heal. I understood why I didn’t trust my judgement, as my adult self struggled to make decisions when the child in me was still crying out for attention and sabotaging my life.
As a coach I now work with others who, like me, have been stuck in a confused state suffering the painful effects of being detached and unable to meet their own needs in a healthy way.
Through talk therapy, human needs-based psychology, family psychology, relationship psychology, mindfulness, meditation, embodiment, inner child healing and energy healing, a path is cleared back to the authentic self.
Finally finding that they can emotionally grow and come from a place of maturity, not compromise themselves for anyone and love, respect and celebrate their true identity.
And most of all embrace the playful side of their inner child with no fear of the opinions of others.
I don’t make light of this painful experience and I am fully aware that there is quite a journey to unfold as the work on self takes place, but I also know that it is totally worth it.
Staying in an unhealed state of being is not an option. Our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health relies on functioning well..
Each of my clients has the opportunity to transform their relationship with themselves and create the relationships of their dreams, just by acknowledging that they are worthy of it. Work truly worth investing in.